Sometimes I think what's the point? Why are we here! Everyone has their purpose, I'm sure! But why do we go through all this hard work to just die. O.k that's a bit harsh and dramatic but sometimes this goes through my mind! I guess those are the 'who am I?' days...'could I be doing something more?' actually 'SHOULD I be doing something more' days.
But then I remember this vision, this dream, this goal. This is what makes me happy and excites me and motivates me every day to get there. This is why I document our lives, every second, every minute, every smile, every tear. I want to remember...forever.
There is a house! A nice, gorgeous house, nothing huge but big enough to have housed, fed and comforted a few children's souls. This house doesn't have the latest gadgets or modern furnishings but comforting decor and children's paintings on the wall. Their heights etched into the walls with tiny little fingers and memories of their little faces looking so excited of the 1 centimeter they have grown since last time! This house has a veranda! A front veranda or full surrounding veranda, it doesn't matter but a veranda. There are two white wooden rocking chairs, faded by the afternoon sun that shines upon them every day. They creak with each single rock over the wooden veranda. These rocking chairs are surrounded by old pots and jugs filled with blooming flowers, favourites that bring memories from earlier years. There is a wheelbarrow in the corner. Old and rusty. It's growing herbs. Their scent is picked up by the afternoon breeze and is sent sailing through the veranda and into the house. Delicate chimes hang from the ceiling and form an orchestra with the native birds. Everyone is in harmony serenading the afternoon with their peaceful chimes and chirps.
He sits there. Dark leather skin from the years of enjoying his favourite past time of fishing in the sun. Hard, course blistered hands from working with every ounce of energy he had to provide an enriched life for our family. Wrinkles surrounding his gorgeous face, wrinkles that show and remind me of every worry he had protecting me and our family. That sparkle. That sparkle in his bright blue eyes is still there. Its never faded. Never will. The sparkle in his eyes captures me and opens the door straight into his soul. The sparkle is his reason. Why he does what he does. Why I fell in love the minute they captured mine in the evening light of December 02. He reaches out his hand and holds mine. We smile. Oh boy do we smile. We are looking through pages upon pages of memories. Memories of the good times. Memories of the sad times. Every crisp or blurry photo brings us back to a special time in our lives. Every word and dramatic sentence ignites a fire of memories that once made us smile and still does in our mature years.
Our children have grown up and have moved away and have started families of their own. Here we sit, older, on our gorgeous veranda of our beautiful house and remember. We remember every single special moment because they are the memories that have lasted forever. We close our eyes and smile. We know we have lived a truly spectacular life and everything we have done or not done has brought us to this very special moment of just being together and remembering.
And that is it. That is what drives me every single day. That is why I take photos of everything and why I write this blog. I do it for us. For our family. So when we are 80 and sitting on our rocking chairs, our memories a little faded, we can open up a book or a photo album and have the memories sore like an eagle straight into our hearts.
We may not save the world, or discovery a cure, or win any awards. But we have each other and I know we will do great things. When life get tough, or we fight, or people disappoint us, or we have money troubles, I take myself to this place. I take myself to that veranda and I know it is all part of our plan. Every joyous moment, every bump in the road. It all happens for a reason and will be a memory in our book to enjoy reading about on our veranda...together.
That is why I write, that is why I take millions of photos,
and that is why I do what I do...
and that is why I do what I do...
x S.K.K x